I just wanted to say, that I can listen to his music again. Seeing his face, I get these fleeting surreal sensations- like it never happened. He didn’t die. That I am still going through school, just catching up on the latest songs I can find on Youtube, in between cups of lattes, hours of procrastination, and the glare of a Microsoft word document- mid essay.
This was the song I posted the Christmas of 2012, before the video got removed. I had used it to lift my spirits.
And funny thing is, whenever I think of him now, I call him by first name. Why is that? I don’t know.
But it feels right. Close.