i had a bad day at work today.
i had a bad interaction at work today.
some attitudes really rub me the wrong the way. you wonder about these people. what type of experiences molded them into the prick they are today. is it bad for me to say that?
i think if i really could embody what it means to forgive, i would not say bad things about anyone.
letting go is such a hard skill for me. i can be very short sighted. i hold grudges. i would probably be one of those people who fit the phrase about forgiving but not forgetting.
people affect me. their bad attitudes affect me. i feel slighted, wronged, humiliated. the feeling lasts all day. will i let it affect my entire weekend? i know i shouldn’t. he isn’t worth it. he seriously. is not worth it.
after work, i had dinner with a friend who used to dance on broadway for six years. she moved back from new york five years ago. it was an interesting dinner to talk about someone’s career as big as that. she is a friend from voice acting. and it was our first dinner together. i walked to indigo, and browsed a lot of new hot reads. bought myself a fairy tale magazine. came back. e was hosting a work party where everyone is playing board games. for some reason, i was surprised when i came back and discovered that they were all young asians. i don’t know why. i feel old around them. like i can’t quite sink into the same level of enthusiasm and energy. but they are so sweet and endearing, the group of them. i feel like i’m at ubc for some reason. i hate board games but ended up playing a little bit with them and it was fun. and then they switched to a harder game and i gave up two minutes into hearing the rules.
i’m not good at board games. my attention span is too small for board game rules. so i’m just hanging out at the table now writing this blog, youtubing. and looking forward to an evening of relaxing into my fairy tale magazine.
i’m about 4 glasses of red wine in. and i had a b52 during dinner.
so, i guess, what i really mean to say after all this is that the weekend has gone off to a good start. and – there really shouldn’t be any reason that i keep on thinking back to that episode this afternoon at work.
i youtubed the life/perspective guru i discovered after my trip to singapore. her name is xandria ooi. it’s a beautiful name and spelling. so much of what she says on line is so inspiring. i will post two vidoes of hers that i watched tonight of forgiving, on letting go. it all makes sense in the moment. but i probably need to replay them 100x over to really let it sink in. cause the moment the video stops, i think back to that – again.
i am grateful for xandria ooi. cheers to all the life gurus who try to help us out there.